Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Gist II

Chie!!! my email box almost caught fire o,with all the comments on the last post.Mehn I did not know people like gist this much o.

New Jersey was cool except for Newark and Orange County looking like Ajegunle.Went to a Naija restaurant/Bar where I saw a couple of old Naija guys acting the fool.Can you imagine a middle age Ibo man in traditional outfit,with like 8 pieces of gold chains with big pendants that will put Pharell to shame around his neck,rings on all fingers and 2 studs in one ear and a cross pendant earring in the other ear.Mehn it was a trip sha.The wedding was good and I had fun as well cos,music was provided by a DJ,who played Oldies,all the Naija new songs and come and see people dancing with their Traditional outfits o.Saw friend I have not seen since we left secondary school(for my peeps who schooled in naija) and high school(for peeps who schooled here)

Anyway where was I.

So like the saying goes "everyday is for the thief,but one day is for the owner of the stolen property"

Let me give a quick intro and info about the house I dropped her and her friend off at.I have a very close friend and am going to call him KA.We started college together and he left for the UK during our 2nd year in college,but we still talk and he comes to Nigeria every xmas and we always hang out.I know his parents,all his brothers and they know me as well and my mum knows him as well.He has an older brother and am going to call him TA.

I ended the part I with dropping AF and her friend off and had to take off cos everybody at the house know me.Well the house I dropped them at was KA's brother TA's house.As at that time TA's wife was in the UK with their kid and TA was the only one at home.

Like I said I dropped them off and left and never mentioned anything to her about it,cos I was still a lil' bit surprised about the whole thing.Anyway I did my investigation and got information from some reliable sources(TA's gateman and housegirl),you know what the right tip can get you in naija.

Anyway to keep long story short,this incident happened in the month of June and KA came home in December.Everytime KA comes home and he is in town,he always stays in his brother TA's house.So one of KA's drivers dropped him off at my house early the next morning after he came in,had to take him around to run some errands and we later ended up at his house(TA's house).We were at the house gisting and the phone rang and I was the nearest person to the phone and was asked to pick up the phone.I picked it up and it was AF on the phone calling to ask about TA.I new she was the one as soon as I heard her voice and it took her some seconds to recognise my voice.She went silent on the phone for like a minute after she knew it was me and later got hold of herself.You know how women always want to play out everything and later want to turn everything on your head after they have been caught red-handed.

Apparently she thought I had told everybody what was going on,to which I had not mentioned anything,and my friend thought I had told her to call me to their house when I told him who was on the phone.She decided to brave it and come over,but I left before she got there to go shower and change clothes.


Wow am actually falling asleep on my laptop here,got to go sleep.Will finish the story 2morrow or day after.






Let me leave you guys with this real life joke that was sent to me by my brother.

A young Yoruba man(definately and ijebu man) walks into a bank in New York City
and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is
going to Lagos on a vacation, for two weeks, and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of
security for the loan, so the Yoruba man hands over the keys to a new brand
BMW 6 Series.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank. The
yourba man produces the title and everything checks out.

The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the
yoruba man, for using an $80,000 BMW as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An
employee of the bank then drives the BMW into the bank's underground
garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the yoruba man returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are
very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out
very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked
you out and found that you are a successful business man. What puzzles
us is,why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The Yoruba man replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car
for two weeks, and pay only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I
return?"
The bank employees watched as he pulls out of the garage, windows down
and
sunroof open. Juju music blasting from his car, as he pulled away.

31 Comments:

At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 3:38:00 AM, Blogger LondonBuki said...

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL That Joke was hilarious!!! I like that man jare, he is SHARP! Maybe I can try that one when I am LOADED! LOL!!!!

NB, I will wait for you to continue the gist, no pressure... LOL!!!

It's still Half Gist sha. Pele oh, AF is ... I can't find the word

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 6:55:00 AM, Anonymous Angie said...

hmmm.... hope u r not acting out "dangerous twins" dat had almost ten parts(..lol).
Nice one abt the yoruba guy.
Pls come and finish the gist and stop making my ears stand like alsatian dog...

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 7:28:00 AM, Blogger Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

NB, u just like trouble sha. Why did u have to include in parenthesis that the man had to be an Ijebu man? Anyways, funny joke, i heard it before but the man was really smart. Think about it, where can u park in NY for that cheap, and u would still find ur car intact without tickets?

I'm waiting to hear the continuation of ur gist sha. I want to know how exactly u caught AF 'cos like my dad would say, "the benefit of the doubt is for the accused." Things aren't always as they seem to be. Glad u had fun at the wedding. This Naija restaurant/ bar u went to in Newark, was it Oduduwa?

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 8:55:00 AM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

Bia Bia Bia.. NB Ogini.., How many times did I say Bia; LOL..

What has her asking you to drop her friend and herself at an uncles place and her calling the house and you picking up. Got to do with undercover dealing. Is it because she thought you had told people of your relationship.

NB all this part 1 & 2 story is confusing me, you should have just told it once. But I wait for the LAST and final instalment.

But the Joke was very funny though. Good to hear to had a super time at the wedding. Its good to have you back.

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 10:47:00 AM, Anonymous zaiprincesa said...

lol..u think u can appease us with a funny joke abi???..WHERE IS THE REST OF THE GIST!!!?????

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 2:09:00 PM, Blogger Smoothvibes said...

ARRRRGGHGH!! Why now?

Newho.. good to have you back.

 
At Tuesday, September 26, 2006 3:29:00 PM, Blogger Mari said...

lmao NB you are such a nutter. Please stop breaking the gist into bits. This ain't Nollyblog.

 
At Wednesday, September 27, 2006 10:30:00 AM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

I will post receipe friday evening - so its very fresh in your memory -

 
At Wednesday, September 27, 2006 11:49:00 AM, Blogger temmy said...

Me no dey like all this half gist syndrome sha. Wicked somebody person you are! Lol.

 
At Wednesday, September 27, 2006 1:03:00 PM, Blogger NaijaBloke said...

@Buki .. Will try and finish the gist by the weekend
@Angie ..LOL@ears standing like Alsatian dog
@Xoxo ..yeah thats where the gist is going to o.. Oduduwa has been close for failing the city inspection o ..I think the place is called "Odabro" or something like that
@Life of a stranger ... u too dey jump ..will finish the story sha and am waiting for my recipe o
@Zaiprincesa .. no vex madam
@smoothvibes .. Whoosah!!! ,..Patience!!!
@Mari.. I know u r enjoying the gist now.. thatz how I feel too when am reading ppl's post and they keep breaking it up.
@Temmy see whoz talking

 
At Wednesday, September 27, 2006 5:25:00 PM, Blogger Life through rose-tinted glasses said...

Naijabloke now everyone knows ur doing this on purpose why now ehn u start gist then u start breaking the gist. pls come back quick and continue lol. nice blog

 
At Wednesday, September 27, 2006 10:48:00 PM, Blogger 9jamommy said...

My friend listen to me!, you are forcing me to post comments that I am normally very stingy with :(, when is part III coming?..nice blog by the way

 
At Thursday, September 28, 2006 4:39:00 AM, Blogger Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

lmao... definitely an ijebu man... hehe.. he's just toooooo funny... what a smartass.. givin us all ideas for real.. yall naija people.. too much cunning.. lol

Come oh.. mr.. y u dey mise this gist self? I want hear as u nab the babe redhanded.. so I dey eagerly await the part 3-7 of this story.

ur just too funny sha

 
At Thursday, September 28, 2006 6:55:00 AM, Blogger Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

You dis boi, u berra come back o. U go lie now say na work no gree u come finish wetin u start. Plz let this be the final part to the gist, and stop putting us in suspense.

 
At Thursday, September 28, 2006 5:14:00 PM, Blogger Omo Ibadan said...

nawa o Mr Naija...u no dey show a sister's blog any love anymore. na so life be abi...:) Hope all is well.

 
At Thursday, September 28, 2006 10:07:00 PM, Blogger Mona said...

ah ah u cant do this to us now, complete the gist matey..

Have a great weekend and happy Independence in Advance!

 
At Friday, September 29, 2006 5:38:00 AM, Blogger Teva said...

MR man...I'll sue you o! For inciting riotous addiction to your blog with Half Gist!!! When will the story end??? Bros, Patcha kwayanga o!

 
At Friday, September 29, 2006 12:57:00 PM, Blogger Tutsy said...

This boy will get me fired....lol...i swear u don kolo finish. See as i grab monitor ready to push am down for floor... all in anger.....naijabloke, we go fight o..i go vex o.....the one wey u dey do, me i no like am o....why u no just finish the tori now......abeg fill me in....i am dying of gbeborun deficiency over here....So what happened?...i bet she must have wished the ground would open up and swallow her when she found out u two were acquinted.....kai!!! this is getting more interesting by the minute.....lol.

Will be back for more gist...abeg this time complete the tori, or all hell will break loose, i refuse to let u have the overwhelming satisfaction of leaving me hanging....'cuz i'm guessing u are starting to enjoy the shit.

 
At Friday, September 29, 2006 7:50:00 PM, Blogger TP said...

Why the half-half gist now? I was enjoying the story in the previous post, then you cut it short. Now you have done it again. Please come back and finish it,in one LAST installment!!

 
At Friday, September 29, 2006 10:38:00 PM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

Dear NB sorry about taking so long with your receipe -

How to make ogbono soup:

1) Bring a half filled pot of water to boil
2) In the boiling water, insert the specified meat (goat, beaf e.t.c, garnished onions, and scotch bonnet pepper
3) Wash the dry fish and stock fish in hot water and add to the boiling water with meat
4) There is no need to add salt at this stage, the stock fish is salty enough for now
5) After approximately 30 mins, add 5 table spoons of red / palm oil
6) Also add some ground pepper if you have any.
7) After 30mins, add maggi cubes (x 2). The water and red oil should have emulsified by now (mixed together)
8) If more salt is required add a little at this stage

9) This is te stage where any type of soup can be made.

If Ogbono then:

10) add the ogbono (and another maggi cube), let it simmer for another twenty mins, then
11) add the leaf - if any.

Make sure you mix it thoroughly as you go along.

This is the way I was thought, I have just made some soup myself so this should help.

Good luck.

 
At Saturday, September 30, 2006 8:58:00 AM, Blogger ABBEY said...

@life of stranger: ur recipe reads like a computer program..."INSERT specified meat", "IF...THEN", lol.

naijabloke there are like 101 ways to make ogbono...and I personally think its hard to screw it up, goodluck

 
At Saturday, September 30, 2006 1:11:00 PM, Blogger Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

Naija bloke.. where u stay for ph?

 
At Monday, October 02, 2006 2:08:00 PM, Blogger Nigerican said...

Naijabloke i am around oh,just been busy with school and work .Looks like u had fun on u're trip : ).

P.s. u betta finish this gist oh, i can't stand the suspense pls.

 
At Monday, October 02, 2006 2:26:00 PM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

@NB - is all at well. I havn't heard from you in a while.

 
At Tuesday, October 03, 2006 5:49:00 PM, Blogger NaijaBloke said...

@everybody .. I apologise for been out .. been a lil busy with work and a couple of other things ..will try and post 2nite sha and DANG!!! .. I love blogsville,reading u guy's comments makes my day most times ..so thank you for all ya comments.

@Life of a stranger - thx a bunch for the recipe ..will try it out by this weekend,hope I get the time to go buy the ingredients,cos I have to drive like an hr to get to any naija store and what is scotch bonnet pepper and how will I know the leaves u r talking abt.Am aiight jere moi dear just busy.

@Abbey ..LOL ..u must be a programmer to have notice that .. will let u know when am done

@ONB- I stayed all over PH if I can say that.. Lets see I 1st stayed on Old Aba rd,like 3mins walk from Shell,later stayed off Ogunabali,later stayed inside D-line and stayed inside the Agip Estate on Okporo Rd.Hope u know all those places.. where did u stay in PH?

 
At Wednesday, October 04, 2006 11:27:00 AM, Blogger Desola said...

Hey! Mr man! where have you been? I keep checking, yet no post. Why now? Abeg do quick before i carry bulala come that your side o. E no go funny, I tell ya!

 
At Wednesday, October 04, 2006 12:27:00 PM, Blogger ABBEY said...

yeah i have some ties with programming...ties which i'm trying to cut off, we don't really get along well.

 
At Wednesday, October 04, 2006 7:15:00 PM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

See NB - how comes you promised to update blog and still no sign. In fact -

 
At Wednesday, October 04, 2006 10:15:00 PM, Blogger Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

Naijabloke: i stayed on isiokpo street in d-line and i went to a secondary school named lao russell memorial secondary school near mile one.. you ever heard of it?

 
At Thursday, October 05, 2006 12:26:00 AM, Blogger LondonBuki said...

My friend, I don't want to read anyone's blog and see a comment from you IF YOU HAVEN'T UPDATED! LOL!!!

Enjoy the rest of your week :-)

 
At Tuesday, October 17, 2006 8:17:00 PM, Blogger The Life of a Stranger called me said...

INGREDIENTS:
Leaf - which ever you like - I prefer spinach

then like Calaba gal says:
Spices - Pepper, salt, Knorr/Maggi cubes, Blended Crayfish etc
Obstructions - Meat, dry fish, cowleg, snails, cowleg, shaki etc
Meat Stock
Palm Oil

How to make ogbono soup:

1) Bring a half filled pot of water to boil
2) In the boiling water, insert the specified meat (goat, beaf e.t.c, garnished onions, and scotch bonnet pepper
3) Wash the dry fish and stock fish in hot water and add to the boiling water with meat
4) There is no need to add salt at this stage, the stock fish is salty enough for now
5) After approximately 30 mins, add 5 table spoons of red / palm oil
6) Also add some ground pepper if you have any.
7) After 30mins, add maggi cubes (x 2). The water and red oil should have emulsified by now (mixed together)
8) If more salt is required add a little at this stage

9) This is te stage where any type of soup can be made - like you brought Your Ukazi soup to - which ever way if fine - then

If Ogbono then:

10) add the ogbono (and another maggi cube), let it simmer for another twenty mins, then
11) add the leaf - if any.

Make sure you mix it thoroughly as you go along.

Food done - its similar to the other soups - their starting point - so when you chose to do Ukazi - you followed a route; Now Ogbono is another route.

Have fun - It looks like I will be salivating here - my ingredients is nearly finished. Need to visit ATL to restock.

 

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